Hey, kid. A little lost at sea, are we? It’s okay. It happens to the best of us. It’s a difficult thing to answer, too. Why do you do what you do? Why you are who you are? I know you’ve been asking yourself the same questions for years. I know you’ve been frozen in time, stretching yourself in every sense of the word.
Thing is, the world will always be disproportionate. There will always be a mismatch. There will be a mismatch of happiness, a mismatch of effort, or a mismatch of love. We, humans, are horrible at keeping things balanced. We tend to make a mess of everything we touch before we start to fix things.
Don’t worry if you’ve messed up a little. If anything, you have a knack for fixing things. Most can’t guarantee that, but you tend to leave things better than you found them. You always have, and you always will. At least, you’ll die trying, which is as noble an ideal as can exist.
The question isn’t what you get in return or how you feel. One does not make an effort to get something; we act based on who we are; it shall always be that way. So, tell me, who are you?
You see, the world eventually tries to turn everyone into the same person. The same broken people, repeated by the millions. The same woes, just in different shells; the same hatred, prejudice, and grudges. Yet, here you are, trying desperately to dislike others and failing.
There is goodness in you. It has been there since you were old enough to ask a stranger if they needed a hand without thought behind your offer. I know you think the answer is guilt, but it’s the world talking, not you.
They will point out your suffering until it’s all you see. There’s more to you than a few open scars. I know you find it hard to hate and easy to forgive. It’s who you’ve always been, and there’s no need for you to change. They can do with someone as emotionally resilient as you.
There’s just one last thing I have to tell you. It’s something the world—I—should’ve told you a long time ago: it’s not your fault. You can be happy, and you can be good; there’s no reason to choose one over the other anymore. It’s not your fault, it never was.
Go now, do what you do best; be good, be yourself.